Monday, March 30, 2015

How to Make LOTS of Money


Previously published on Yahoo Contributor Network and then stolen by one of those plagiarized sites I mentioned in the following linked blog: WRITERS! This Site is Stealing Your Work! Rather than change the whole thing to past tense, I kept everything in the present and mentioned in various places certain changes that have taken place since I first wrote this article. 

Ah, money! Who doesn't love money? We are in love with the sound of it, the smell of it, the feel of it - and, oh, yes, the everything of money.

We even write songs about it, like Money by Pink Floyd, Can't Buy Me Love by The Beatles, Can't Always Get What You Want by the Rolling Stones, and For the Love of Money by the O'Jays.

Money, money, money, money - what a melodious word. And oh, what we do for the love of money. With all the romanticism surrounding money, though, you would think money was the answer to every problem. It's not. However, money can be problematic, though usually more because of its absence than because of its presence.

The biggest problem with money, as I see it, is our relationship with money. It's all so one-sided. We love money, but money doesn't love us back. And though we want money, some of us can't seem to find it. When we get money, some of us lose it.

Some of us save it for a rainy day; others lavishly spend it. Some of us give our money away, and some of us hoard it. But more often than not, many of us hunger for it. We need money and money seems to know it.

But money doesn't care, and money doesn't realize its worth. We realize its worth, though, because in our quest for money, some of us resort to illegal activities to obtain it. Money from drugs and gambling can build empires. The trade-off is the constant threat of losing every dollar (and more) we steal, or going to prison - not a risk I'm wiling to take.

The most common way to get money, other than to receive it as a gift, through inheritance, or through any of the methods mentioned above, is to work for it. For instance, right now, because I work as a writer, I make my living writing blogs and articles.

I use the term, "living" loosely. At $1.55 for every one thousand people who read my Associated Content/Yahoo Contributor Network articles, if I wanted to make $2,000 a month, I would have to snag at least 1,290,322.58 readers each and every month. I have been on AC/YCN since June of '08 and as of this posting have received less than 85,000 total reads. (UPDATE: AC/YCN has been kaput for a while now.)

Another way I make money is through Adsense and Amazon (no longer on Amazon). I also write for Xomba where they (used to) share their Adsense revenue with me.

But so far, I haven't even made the minimum $100 needed for a payout. Until I reach $100, I receive nothing, so I check my Adsense growth for some sign of income. So far, since March of 2009, my Adsense earnings from my blogs and, more recently from Xomba, have reached a staggering $43 (in 2010 when I wrote this post).

Writing is obviously not supporting me, so what if I were to change jobs?

If I were a star athlete for the Chicago Cubs in 2010, I could make $2,125,000. Not bad for a season's worth of work.

But with a bad back, a horrible history of asthma, breast cancer, absolutely no athletic skills whatsoever, and, did I mention how old I am (59)? - I can't count on making even a nickel playing sports.

So what about acting? If I were Mariska Hargitay or Christopher Meloni (of Law & Order: SVU), I could expect to make $395,000 per episode. I could live on that.

However, if I were Charlie Sheen (of Two and a Half Men), I could command $1.25 million PER EPISODE (less than the $2 million he supposedly made the year before). Hey! If I were Charlie Sheen, I could even be the philanthropist he is and help those poor prostitutes who have to work hard for a living.

I wonder, though, how Jon Cryer (of Two and a Half Men) feels. He makes less than half of his co-worker's salary, a mere $550,000 per episode (poor man), but I could hone my acting skills if I thought I could bring in half a million dollars.

I don't see myself as an actor though, nor would I ever wanted to be an actor.

Maybe I should report the news. Matt Lauer (of Today) makes more than $16 million a year. Or I could host my own reality show. Ryan Seacrest (of American Idol) makes $15 million a year.

Yes! That's it! I could gather all of my grandchildren together, start my own family show, and, like Kate Gosselin (of Kate Plus 8), bring in $250,000 per episode.

Oh, who am I kidding? I'd probably do better as a talk show host. Contrary to comments I've heard people say, such as, "I wouldn't know what to do with all that money," I would really like to try living on Oprah Winfrey's $315 million salary. I'd even settle for Chelsea Handler's (of Chelsea Lately) meager yearly income of $3.5 million.

Alas, I am only a writer. So what can I expect to make? Well, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, "Median annual wages for salaried writers and authors were $53,070 in May 2008. The middle 50 percent earned between $38,150 and $75,060. The lowest 10 percent earned less than $28,020, and the highest 10 percent earned more than $106,630."

I've decided I would like to be in the top 10 percent, and I would like to have a more fulfilling relationship with money.

So - I have a request to make of you, my readers: Please contact 69 million of your friends and relatives and ask them to read my articles. To help my Adsense growth, please read my blogs and invite your friends and relatives to read them as well. (For convenience sake, I have included links to all of my blogs and articles at the end of this article.)

Lesson to be gained from reading this article: if you want to make lots of money, prepare for yourself a career in the entertainment field.

By the way, if you are interested in learning the salaries of various sports teams and their stars, click THIS USA Today LINK! Pick a sport, choose a player's name or team, decide which year you would like to investigate, and discover what salary your favorite player made. The site goes back only so far though, so if you're expecting to find Michael Jordan's salary from the 1980s, you're out of luck.

If you've made it all the way to the end - to this paragraph, I want to personally thank you for taking the time to read the entire article. Don't forget to tell 69 million of your closest friends to read my blogs and articles each month - I'm aiming for that top earning status for writers!

So, how can we make LOTS of money? We have to become coveted actors, sports players, or talk show hosts!


Sources http://www.bls.gov/
http://www.usatoday.com/

What follows is a list of my blogs. If you see anything that appeals to you, I invite you to click the link and read some of the blogs. Thank you for visiting!


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